Constellation STARISH
by Star-Winged Sky
Summary: "Spinning seven, I create a constellation." Each member of STARISH is a complex and bright star belonging to the same constellation; there are connections between all of them, forming the larger image. [Reflections and insights; a character and relationship study. One chapter for each of our favorite princes. Please review and tell us what you think.]
1. Shinomiya

**Author's Note:**

Hello, everyone, and welcome to the first fanfiction under this joint account between my sister and me, Kooples.

Rhythm: She's doing most of the work. ^_^; I'm just here for the bishies!

Lols. Naw, she'll start pulling her weight soon. -cracks knuckles- Anyway, down to the important stuff! This little fic IS complete, we'll be updating every other day. Expect more from us in the future~

UtaPri has captured our imaginations. x3

**Spoilers:** For... a lot of things. xD Don't read unless you've watched all of the second season, or unless you just don't care about spoiling it.  
**Character(s):** Shinomiya Natsuki/Satsuki.  
**Rating:** K+  
**Genre:** General, introspective, friendshippy... ish?

**Disclaimer:** We don't own UtaPri, obviously.

* * *

**S**hinomiya _Satsuki_ is everything that **S**hinomiya _Natsuki_ isn't, and if he has his way he always will be.

He is bitterness and fury, raw and seething under the surface, held at bay and wielded against the enemy at will; he is sharp intensity and calculation, able to discern the potential danger in everyone around them with ease; but above all else he was born of _despair_, and carries their memory of that, and he will _never_ allow them (_Natsuki_) to be affected by that black horror ever again. He will protect them. He will appear when necessary and destroy everything that threatens them.

Natsuki will never know. He doesn't _need_ to know.

If Satsuki is everything that Natsuki isn't... then, obviously, the reverse is true as well.

Natsuki is innocence and kindness and generosity incarnate. He doesn't have a mean or violent bone in his body, though he's certainly been known to cause a few accidents by route of his, ah, excessive _enthusiasm_. He's bright and open in an endearingly, if puzzlingly childish way, and he's... Well, if Satsuki can always see the danger in people, Natsuki only ever sees potential friends, who he used to tend to latch onto with a suffocating intensity (that _intensity_ is something the pair of them share) - or at least until Satsuki got rid of them somehow.

Maybe that's _why_ he clings like that; because he suspects something that he doesn't understand will drive them away.

Yeah, Satsuki kept him safe... But on the other hand...

Natsuki used to be very lonely.

(Perhaps they _both_ are, but Satsuki would never look for that in himself, much less _admit_ it if he finds it...)

Satsuki did know that about his counterpart, though. That's why he allowed their continued association with Kurusu Syo.

That annoying little pet or whatever he is of Natsuki's is an anomaly. He always has been, from the very first meeting - he's a small package of a surprisingly large amount of contradictions, and Satsuki can't ever figure out exactly what his reactions or actions will be. Satsuki can't decide if he's a threat or not, but he keeps Natsuki pretty happy and has yet to make a move that's detrimental to them, so for now he'll be allowed stay as close as he is.

Besides, no matter what he tried, discreetly or openly, he was never quite able to shake the shrimp off of them. Even revealing his existence and threatening directly (a trick he'd never had to pull before Kurusu) didn't deter the brave little brat... Much. Despite all his protests, Satsuki has no doubt that he at least cares about Natsuki in some form or he wouldn't put up with either of them, and that's _something_.

But recently... Satsuki isn't quite sure what's going on. Things are _changing_, and he doesn't know if he likes that.

This past year, starting at Saotome Academy and then beyond - the Nanami girl, STARISH, the debut, the agency and their work, the Uta Pri Award... Things are shifting, under the surface of their mind, and Satsuki can feel the differences in his counterpart from where he rests, watching the world go by behind Natsuki's lenses with eyes keen for danger.

And now... Natsuki has a fascination with _her_ that Satsuki knows in their bones that he wouldn't be able to stop if he tried. And then there's the other five boys who are apparently their _friends_ now, who even know about him and haven't cut ties, and Satsuki is uneasy.

Something inside of them (inside of _Natsuki_) is unfolding, blooming, seeing the light of day for the first time. He's flourishing in this environment, with Nanami Haruka and STARISH, with friends and being able to practice his art and learn new skills and grow within his old ones like never before... And some of the empty and jagged spaces between the two of them, in their mind, are beginning to heal.

He doesn't know how to deal with this, so he stays dormant for the most part. He lets Natsuki, Natsuki who is changing, who wants to be stronger, who wrote a _song for him_, take the reigns. He has to admit, he is a little curious about what all this means for them.

He understands at least a little why Natsuki thinks like he does about Nanami, and as for the other members of STARISH, well... They're the hardest targets he's had to keep an eye on for Natsuki yet. At this point there's nothing he can do to rescue them from this situation. Natsuki already trusts them like he's never trusted anyone else, and Satsuki can't bear to take that away from him now... But it's going to _hurt_ when things inevitably go wrong.

He may not be able to take preventative measures, but he can sure be ready to act when it's time, and he will be. He won't let this - won't let _anything_ - shatter Natsuki again.

He'll be _watching_.


	2. Tokiya

**Author's Note:**

Hello again, Kooples here! :3 Rhythm is occupied by Harvest Moon: Animal Parade and currently unavailable for comment.

Aheh, so sorry! This is a bit late... But hey, it's still Saturday where I am... XD Meh. Anyway, enjoy the chapter. n.n

**Spoilers:** For... a lot of things. xD Don't read unless you've watched the second season, or unless you just don't care about spoiling it.**  
****Character(s):** Ichinose Tokiya.  
**Rating:** K+  
**Genre:** General, introspective, friendship.

**Disclaimer:** Do not own... but definitely do want~

* * *

At times, Ichinose **T**okiya isn't really sure how to react to all the recent changes in his life.

He's always been a perfectionist, and he knows it. He doesn't mind. If it makes the quality of his work better, then why would he?

He was born with a natural talent for singing and for acting, and his mother always encouraged it in him. She delighted in his creativity and his voice, but she never let it go to his head; she always taught him the value of hard work and to put his best effort into everything he does.

His father... Not so much. He made his feelings clear on what he thought of his son's career preferences as he raised him, and then it was hammered home over the long, cold divorce. Tokiya never allows himself to dwell on what his dreams did to his parents' relationship if he can help it. At least his father never tries to contact them.

His mother, though... Maybe it is because of her that he's a perfectionist. No, that's not quite right; she planted the seeds of those values in him, but he knows he takes it to extremes sometimes.

All right. If he's honest... All of the time.

When he was younger, he felt like he had something to prove to his father. He was _good_ at what he could do, and he _knew_ it, but the man never seemed to see it, to understand what music meant to him... And he went out of his way to ignore or if he was feeling particularly displeased, _belittle_ his son's accomplishments, or to attempt to direct him toward some other career.

It drove Tokiya to work hard, all right. He got into the habit of overachieving at a young age during school, trying to struggle against his father's attempts at control in his own quiet way, to make his father proud of him for who he was, not who his father wanted him to be... Yes, his mother has often had to force him to take better care of himself. It seems like he never learns, huh? When he graduated, and eventually became HAYATO, that was what got him into trouble.

And now? His life is so different, he can hardly believe he's the same person as he was a year ago. Is he Ichinose Tokiya? Truly? That same person with the hollow voice and eyes, who looked into the mirror and saw only a stage mask? Yes, yes he is. He knows it, now. He has life in him again, he's found passion and _heart_. He had lost everything that he's always loved about music, but he's found it once more and he's never, _ever_ going to loose it again. Nanami-san showed him, and made sure of that.

Before...

His mother has always supported him, in everything, and he will probably never be able to express how much she means to him, but that's all right. She knows, he's sure. He had never truly had time for real friends at any point in his life, merely acquaintances, and they came second to his schooling or work. His previous agency... They supported him in the loosest sense, in a purely professional capacity, and even in that they looked after their own interests, not _his_.

And now?

Well, of course he's with a much better agency, one that values him and what he _wants_, not just his _voice_ and what he can do with it.

He... He has STARISH. He's never had a support system quite like this before.

He has _friends_, not just _colleagues,_ and he's still sometimes astonished over it. Sometimes he starts to fall into old habits, or forgets he has people who will help him out now - but they always remind him, in their own ways. And he, in his own quiet, unobtrusive way, tries to find ways to help them in return.

He's found a best friend in his roommate, the one member of their band who is the complete opposite of him and who used to drive him up the wall; it's a friendship which he never would have expected, but is grateful for. Otoya is boundless energy and cheer and compassionate understanding, all of which Tokiya finds he's come to rely on, and in return he's a balance and a sounding board, a well of calm and focus and advice that the younger boy needs.

He's found an equally unexpected kinship with Ren. They're the eldest of the group, the ones who keep the others in line when it's needed, and they've found that a strange understanding has popped up between them because of their similar previous circumstances with lacking that all-important _heart_ in their music. He occasionally shares tips with Ren for improving his vocals, and lately Ren has been showing him how to play darts. He's rubbish at it, much to the orange-haired boy's amusement.

He's learned to tell the difference between when Kurusu-kun actually needs a break from Shinomiya-san, and when they're simply up to their usual antics, and how to delicately redirect the situation as required.

For Shinomiya-san... Ah, well, he actively makes sure there's a pair of glasses of _some_ kind in _every_ room now. He (and everyone else, really, but he's the most successful at it because he's the only one who is actually _discreet_) has also begun to carefully feed Shinomiya-san hints and alterations for basic cooking knowledge, but it's a slow, _slow_ process. At least it's working (a little) much to everyone's relief.

When he knows one or both of them needs it, he'll sit quietly beside Hijirikawa-san after hours with a book in his hands, while the younger boy practices that artful calligraphy of his. They're both alike in the way that sometimes all they need is some peace and quiet companionship.

He's the one who Aijima-san will approach, looking sheepish or confused, when he needs some strange Japanese custom or phrase explained, and Tokiya will oblige with a calm smile.

And when they _sing_... When STARISH sings together, it's like nothing he's ever experienced. It's the most fantastic feeling in the world, to join his voice with all of theirs, and to weave such wonderful, beautiful music - to bring to life the pieces that Nanami-san makes for them.

Friends... If this is what they do for each other, then no wonder he lost himself so easily years ago. These bonds are so vital to what he does and who he is now, he wonders once in a while if he'll know who Ichinose Tokiya is if, heavens forbid, he loses them. There is a solution to that, though: don't lose them.

He won't. He's found where he belongs, and he's here to stay.


	3. Aijima

**Author's Note:**

Woo, I'm on time today! It's a little short, now that I look over it again... Oh, well.

Rhythm: Hope you enjoy the update! -pets sleeping Kuppuru on lap-

**Spoilers:** For... a lot of things. xD Don't read unless you've watched the second season, or unless you just don't care about spoiling it.**  
****Character(s):** Aijima Cecil.  
**Rating:** K+  
**Genre:** General, introspective, friendship.

**Disclaimer:** Not ours... Life is so unfair.

* * *

**A**ijima Cecil has lead what you might call a charmed life, but even so... Right now, he feels _truly_ blessed.

He has lived as a Prince of Agnapolis does, in splendor and lacking for nothing. He's had every material want fulfilled, he has been educated on everything he desires (which is quite a lot; he _loves_ to learn almost as much as he loves to sing and dance), he is extraordinarily talented at the favored arts of the Muses, he has never lacked for friends... Although he is sure they were not quite the same as his friends now.

He was the King's only son, after all. They _had_ to be his friends.

And, there. That was the problem with his 'charmed' life.

He had been the Heir of the Throne of Agnapolis, a path decided for him from birth. He hadn't realized it, until that, er, _incident_ that ended up with him being forced into the form of a cat, but...

He had never been satisfied with his life, inside. He had always been missing something, something _important_, but he had never truly been able to realize it, because he was set on following the path chosen for him without ever lifting his eyes from it.

And then, one day...

He looked up at the sky, and he dreamed of flying.

Or, he was turned into a cat, he ran away from home, he came to Japan, and Haruka... And he found her _music_.

_Such music!_

Never in his life has he heard someone who can create such beautiful, beautiful sounds as she can. He knew at once that the Muses had guided him to the person who would break his curse - but he hadn't realized that she would be the one to break the overall larger chokehold that had been placed around his life.

She thought _he_ was the one who had brought STARISH together? No, not at all, though he knows she won't take her own credit for it, being how she is. All he had done was look at her, and he had _known_ that the Muses themselves were planning something wondrous, if only she would take that first step... It was all Haruka. He merely gave her a nudge in the right direction. She has chosen her own path, much like he has.

It was because of her that he discovered that he wanted something _else_, other than to eventually take the Throne, and once he knows he wants something he wastes no time in reaching for it. Some people might call what he has now, what he has abdicated his birthright for, _less_ than what he could have, but he knows better.

He has been rich in material things all of his life. Now, he has found what he was missing. He has found a _home_, a family of _his_ choosing, and a path that he can put all of his being into. He can invoke emotions and change in other people as an idol, and that's a gift and a power he had never considered, and even... Perhaps he can do it in an even better way, and in more people, than if he were a King.

He can sing anything and everything so much better with these six new friends of his than he could have ever achieved on his own. He knows that now, because of STARISH.

He is rich in new purpose, and in his _heart_, and that is what means more than all the crowns and titles in the world.


	4. Ren

**Author's Note:**

Reeeeen~ I love this guy, I really do. He isn't my favorite... That spot belongs to Otoya. But I do adore him, and he is Rhythm's fav. This chapter was really fun to write. X3

(Wow, I just realized... I'm copying and pasting my info things without even thinking about it. The only thing I bother to change is the name of the character and the disclaimer. How lazy can you get? xD)

**Spoilers:** For... a lot of things. xD Don't read unless you've watched the second season, or unless you just don't care about spoiling it.**  
****Character(s):** Jinguji Ren.  
**Rating:** K+  
**Genre:** General, introspective, friendship.

**Disclaimer:** Not mine, not mine... But I'd love to be _Ren_'s lady for a day. Who wouldn't? xD

* * *

Jinguji **R**en is a very perceptive person, far moreso than the majority of the people he meets ever give him credit for.

It's because he fools them on purpose, most of the time. They see what they expect to see based on how he acts, and on his reputation (which he has built himself), rather than judging him with their own eyes, than trying to look underneath the surface.

Ha! It's their loss, it truly is.

It's a mask, of sorts, that he's developeid over his life. Being the third son of a wealthy family almost required it, should he wish to keep his sanity intact. Not that he _isn't_ like he advertises, of course; all the best masks are based in truth. He simply... Embellishes, a little, and takes care that he hides the vulnerable parts that he doesn't want others to know about, at least around those that would like to use him. And he's absolutely not going to become something he isn't, like the rest of the so-called high society try to do.

Ren knows exactly what he's like, he makes no excuses for himself. He never has, and he never will. He's seen too much of that in his family and in their associates, and he doesn't want to become trapped like that himself. He has always set himself apart from his family, sometimes drastically so, with all of his blatant drama and interest in idols, and his borderline obsessive flirting. No, the business world is something he's never wanted a part of, he made sure they knew that...

... But when his own brother _forced_ him into Saotome Academy for the _family's_ benefit (the _business'_, in other words) supposedly as a representative (a _poster boy_)?

No. He wasn't about to have that. He was _not_ going to be _used_ by them.

He knew, somewhere in the back of his mind, that he was more or less shooting himself in the foot by acting out like he was. He did everything shy of being actually destructive to get himself expelled, even though there was a voice in the back of his mind - sounding oddly, painfully, like his mother's - that had scolded him. It had always been telling him that if he just sucked it up and _tried_ _for_ _himself,_ and quit acting out at his brother, if he would stop sabotaging his own future, he _could_ find some contentment and enjoyment in music for himself...

He ignored it, and went about his business of skipping class, ignoring assignments and collecting fangirls and admirers, glorying in the attention he had always gathered to himself wherever he went. It was a hollow attention, and he knew it, but it was the best source of _positive_ attention he had. More than he ever got from his family, at any rate.

And then... Nanami Haruka figuratively knocked him off of his high horse and showed him what he could achieve if he would just get out of his own head and put that _passion_ of his into something other than self-destructive temper tantrums.

That was what his actions had amounted to, he acknowledges, at least privately. He _is_ a passionate person. He had let his emotions toward his brother get ahold of him. Growing up in the environment that he had, he _had_ learned to step back from a situation and use a clear mind, to keep his head cool and to analyze, but he had cast that aside along with most everything else he'd gotten from his family in his anger, and in his attempts to distance himself from them.

He had almost lost the best chance of his life.

STARISH was not anything like what he had envisioned himself doing, even when he had been toying with ideas before being shunted aside into Saotome Academy.

He has competent colleagues - _more_ than just competent - he has a free pass to do what he loves without being associated with his family... That's what he wanted, before, and he's got it. But it is _more_ than that. It is so much _more_ than he had ever expected. It sounds cheesy and trite to say it like this, but they are his _friends_.

There is so much that can be put into that little word.

He trusts them, and he cares about them... They are so much more important than his admirers have ever been, or even his family. They accept him, they appreciate him for who he is, they care in return - they are... They, and the work they do together _matters _to him, in a way that nothing in his life ever has. It's more than a little unnerving, at times, but in a good way, if that makes any sense.

And the Lady herself... She is a jewel, of worth beyond measure.

Ren has watched as she's taken each of the seven of them and _fixed_ them. It wasn't a planned thing. She was never doing it with the intention of making an _investment_, for her own gain, or anything of that sort. She really, truly, honestly wanted to _help_, to make them better than they were, to give them answers for their problems... She is utterly selfless, and he cannot even begin to describe how _rare_ and _precious_ a trait that is, and that's only one of the many good things about her.

She's their center, the reason for their existence as STARISH (he took what she said about Cesshi with a grain of salt; she's far too humble), and in one way or another, she's the reason that the seven of them are who they are now. He has no illusions about what they all feel for her.

There's certainly a whole lot less flirting going on now-a-days on _his_ part, other than what is expected of him toward STARISH's fans. That, and naturally he _has_ to tease his adorable Little Lamb. He just can't help himself; she is so _easy_ to fluster!

At any rate, he digresses.

He's found something worth putting his effort and his _passion_ into, and when he falls asleep at night, every night, he's never felt more eager for the next day to come.


	5. Ittoki

**Author's Note:**

Freakin' all of my yes for Otoya! *heart* (Stupid FF, taking away the lessthanthree symbol...)

Yeah this one is pretty short, too. But I kinda did it like this on purpose. I got everything out how I wanted it, so I was happy despite the length.

Rhythm is... Doing something mysterious with her phone. Idk, and I'm not sure if I want to. xD But I hollered to tell her I'm updating and she says hi to you all, lovely viewers. :3

**Spoilers:** For... a lot of things. xD Don't read unless you've watched the second season, or unless you just don't care about spoiling it.**  
****Character(s):** Ittoki Otoya.  
**Rating:** K+  
**Genre:** General, introspective, friendship.

**Disclaimer:** We don't own Uta no Prince-sama... Can someone fix that for us? xD

* * *

**I**ttoki Otoya has always formed connections with people very easily.

He's never spared much of himself in regards to others. Just a little, really; the things he doesn't want to bother them with, the things that might hurt them... And maybe one or two things he thinks _they_ might hurt _him_ with, even if unintentionally. He dislikes pain of various kinds as much as the next guy, after all. He does hate to outright lie, though, so he conveniently just _doesn't mention_ this or that or the other thing...

Honestly though, it's not like he has much to hide. And they don't need to be bothered with his problems, anyway. They all have their own, right? There's enough worry and sadness floating around out there in the world.

He's very open with himself, very free and giving with who he is and what he has, and because of that, he's aware that people often describe him as being "_warm._" He knows he is; he _wants_ to be that way. There are enough people in the world who are cruel, or jealous, or angry, already. He never wants to be like them. If he can make someone else feel _warmer_, even if it's only for just a little while, he's accomplished a wonderful thing.

He's had such a lucky life. Why shouldn't he be this way?

He _wants_ to share some of his happiness with others. He wants to make friends, to make their lives just a little better if he can, one smile at a time. He knows he's a little dense, and a little too energetic, and sometimes his mouth might run away with him, and that he won't get along with everyone, but he _tries._

He's been given so much.

His mother saved his life at the cost of her own when he was a child, and there is so much that he's said and thought about that. He's been given a pair of terrific adoptive parents, and the ability and time to care for the other children and help out the caretakers at his old orphanage. He's been gifted with an incredible talent that he can use, with his voice and with his fingers on guitar strings to make others _feel_, and that, in and of itself, is worth more than any amount of money it can earn him.

Yeah, he's been given more than he probably deserves in the long run, so he's going to do his best with it. Especially...

Especially _now_... Things have been stacked up so high in his favor he can hardly believe it. He's been so fortunate as to find a place to really belong, to use his talents so that many can hear, and... And now, he has people who can make _him_ smile as well. The connections he has built with his fellow members of STARISH all feel like a different type than the connections he usually makes with people, and he wonders... Is this what a _real_ family is like?

He has Tokiya, and Syo, and Natsuki, and Ren, and Masa, and Cecil, and... Nanami. And there are days when he thinks about all of them, and suddenly he's smiling so widely his face could crack and his chest is so tight he can't breathe properly. If this isn't what having a real family is like, he doesn't think he could physically stand it if he did have one.

His heart has never felt so full.


	6. Syo

**Author's Note:**

It's Syo's turn, horray. :3 Wow, only one more chapter after this. That went by fast. XD

Not really much on our minds to say... So just enjoy the chapter. ^^

**Spoilers:** For... a lot of things. xD Don't read unless you've watched the second season, or unless you just don't care about spoiling it.**  
****Character(s):** Kurusu Syo.  
**Rating:** K+  
**Genre:** General, introspective, friendship.

**Disclaimer:** No worries, I know it's not mine... I'm not that delusional, right, Alfred? -cuddles the invisible animal in her arms-

* * *

Kurusu **S**yo was very weak for the first years of his life.

He was born with a rare heart condition, and it came close to ruining him. It was supposed to flat out kill him around when reached twelve years old. And it nearly killed Kaoru, too, for all the stress it put him through.

Syo had always hated this fact of his life, back then. And he hated what it was putting his family through, especially his twin.

And then he saw "_The Prince of Fighting_," and that was the start of everything. It was the start of his _life_; it was _that_ dramatic an impact on him. Hyuuga Ryuya inspired him to _fight_ and to _live_.

So he simply decided that his idiotic weak heart _wouldn't kill him_, and that was it.

It was a long, slow slog, but he worked his body _hard_. He took up running, he entered a dojo and began karate classes, he learned to dance and to sing and eventually, on a whim, to play an instrument he'd found more and more fondness for - the violin (which ended up gaining him the best and most infuriating friend of his life, though he would never _dare_ tell Natsuki that for fear of suffocation). He worked for his health and he nurtured whatever hint of talent he found and _earned_ every ounce of his skills, and he's _proud_ of what he can do.

Yeah, he knows he can come across as egotistical and overconfident and short-tempered, and maybe he _is_ all of those things to a degree. He doesn't care. He's gone through a lot to get to where he is, and if someone tells him he's too _short_ or _girly_ they can just stuff it. It isn't his fault his body had to fight itself to grow as much as it has. They don't know him, they don't have a right to judge him.

There have always been any number of things about him that he's supposed have put people off of getting close to him. His sickly and weak self back when he was little, and then his _abrupt_ change in attitude and goals, and how he's toughened up... Well, whatever. If they can't handle him, it's not his problem.

Natsuki had been... Ahem. There are a lot of words that can describe that crazy moron. But he had been such a complete swap from what Syo had been expecting from others as a kid that he was easy on him, and by the time they grew up and started seeing each other more often in competitions, it was far too late to shake him off. Even if he'd wanted to, by then.

It was... Not exactly _flattering_ to constantly be called cute or petite or whatever crap came out of Natsuki's mouth on a scarily regular basis, but it was definitely said in a different spirit than the usual heckling. Natsuki was so _nice_ and so _honest_, it was hard to dislike the guy, even if he could put Syo through some pretty inconvenient (read: embarrassing... And traumatizing) things.

And then he met _Satsuki_. The less said about _that_, the better. Just... Ugh.

But after he calmed down and the chills of terror quit crawling up and down his spine... After he thought it through, the incident made him identify with Natsuki a little more. Natsuki was just as messed up as he had been, only in his head instead of his body.

So he ended up sticking with the (literally) insane musical genius who kept trying to squeeze him to death every five minutes or feed him poison every other day, despite his better judgment.

It was inevitable that they both got into Saotome's, and it was there that everything would change. Not that he hadn't entered the school in hopes of changes, but _this_ was something he had never imagined in his wildest dreams.

STARISH has been an incredible success, and in more than just the idol world. It has been a success with its _members_ as well, with the people who make up the team.

They have a synergy that Syo never thought he would find anywhere. They are _amazing_ together, both as a group of musicians and as friends. He is thoroughly enjoying having so many people to hang out with and just _be himself_ with, and who can do the same with him. It all makes a feedback loop of camaraderie and... It's so sappy, but he can't help but privately bask in it, like stupid Natsuki and his patches of sunlight.

No, it isn't always perfect. They're seven really different teenage guys, of course there are going to be rough patches and clashing personalities. But for the most part...

Yeah, Syo is _pumped_ about their work, and he knows he isn't the only one. It doesn't always happen, of course, because there's always room for improvement or reasons someone is out of sync - but more and more often lately there's an underlying energy that runs through them all when they're working together. They just... They just click, or whatever you want to call it.

They are fantastic, and Syo knows they have potential to be even better still. He _can't wait_ to reach it.


	7. Hijirikawa

**Author's Note:**

Wow, the last chapter already...

Thanks so much for taking the time to read this! :3 We'd both appreciate it very much if you'd leave your thoughts for us in a review.

**Spoilers:** For... a lot of things. xD Don't read unless you've watched the second season, or unless you just don't care about spoiling it.**  
****Character(s):** Hijirikawa Masato.  
**Rating:** K+  
**Genre:** General, introspective, friendship.

**Disclaimer:** Oh? We don't own UtaPri? Why didn't someone tell us this earlier?!

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**H**ijirikawa Masato has always been the epitome of cool, calm and collected.

Or at least he was until Nanami Haruka entered his life. And then she turned everything utterly upside down.

That day he saw her, teaching young children to sing... It awakened something inside of him, and that _something_ has grown ever farther out of his control since.

It's... It's frightening, and exhilarating at the same time, and he always waits with baited breath for the next time that _something_ unfurls just a little further.

Masato's emotions have always been firmly under his own control. He has been taught and molded to be someone in particular (what his father needed... _Wanted_ him to be) ever since he was very young. It is the eldest Hijirikawa son's responsibility to be groomed and trained to take over the family's business when his father retires.

His upbringing was strict and traditional. He was taught to speak and to behave and even to _walk_ a certain way, at all times. His education was provided by the best tutors money can buy, and he was expected to pull only excellent grades. He learned how to manage the finances and affairs of a major business before he even graduated his earlier teenage schooling years.

He knows it is only because of his grandfather that he has anything in him that isn't related to the cold world of business, of numbers and negotiations. He doesn't resent what his family has tried to make him into (and perhaps they will still try). He does understand why; to them, in their small, closed-off world, it is simply the way things are. It was useful to learn; his time certainly wasn't wasted... It strikes him as ironic how he thinks of his father's career that way, when he knows his father would believe _his_ new choices to be wasteful.

Still, he is, has always been... C_ontrolled_, both by the people around him and even more tightly so inwardly, a cage of his own making. His grandfather helped to temper that to a degree; he taught Masato to love the arts. He taught him to sing and to play the piano; to use that control to make something beautiful. Masato knew he was adequate at it by Hijirikawa standards (far above most others'), but it was never anything serious to him, if he was asked, though he's not sure who he was fooling.

He dearly _wanted_ it to be.

It wasn't until he happened to see Nanami that first time that he realized how dearly, and... If he had the strength to stand up to his father about it... He could do something about what _he_ wanted, for the first time in his life.

He's become unafraid to admit that he wants more than what his family's preconceived path for him will take him to, and he has found it.

He also learned what was missing from his music, the second time he met her, and even now he is still learning. It's not quite like how he knows Jinguji and Ichinose were re-inspired... No, they had lost what they'd already known, and needed to find it again. He's discovering it for the first time.

It's very difficult to understand and control emotions, both at once. He's still coming to find out how much of that tight control he's always had to loosen, and how much to keep. He's truly giving his attention to such things now, rather than the logic and facts and analysis that were once the sole tools he used to survey the world around him, but it's... Unfamiliar, and uncomfortable, at times.

His fellow members of STARISH have helped him a great deal, as has, of course, Nanami. He couldn't have done any of this without them. He's coming to learn to listen to that poor underused organ in his chest, all thanks to them, and the music they create together.

He knows he won't be giving this up because his father tells him to, not without a fight.

He isn't going to be controlled anymore, not by anyone but himself.


End file.
